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Roles of wives in Islam
Is it written in Islam if what is the meaning of first wife and the meaning of second wife? for example if a muslim man married two wife. what will be the role of the first wife and what will be the role of the second wife?
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Do you agree : "This House believes that Gulf Arabs value profit over people"
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Total votes: 276








britexpat said
I love QL.. ...I think kO-kO took Abu's advice and is ready to start another war..
Good luck.. I'm out of here..
Luckyjinx said
ko-ko ...Interested to know also.. :)
"Only in Dreams but Never in Reality"
LEGENDWAR said
KO KO ...Dont get worried!!
Therez no value difference in b/w the wives. Both have the equal rights and duties as well.
But husband of two or more has to be more catious about to provide equal & respectful rights to his wives.
AyeSsaH said
no value difference ...hmmm tricky... God forbids as I can not handle being a second wife nor the first of two... I'm unreasonably a jealous person (since birth). I salute to those who are already in this scenario.
clearbluesky said
All wives hv the same roles and husband has the same duty ...towards everyone, if you r genuinely interested to know the Islamic view point, why dont u have a look at Islamic websites, instead of QL. It's not the best place to ask about Islam. To make ur life easier, I hv pasted one link, you can search many other sites also. This link reasons out why polygamy is allowed very logically and it gives links to another question explaining why polyandry is not allowed. Hope its helpful.
http://www.islamonli...
Something is better than nothing but nothing is better than nonesense :p
realsomeone said
clearbluesky ...that is good suggestion if the person having innocent question.
Poverty is not for the sake of hardship. No, it is there because nothing exists but God. Poverty unlocks the door -- what a blessed key!
- Jalaluddin al-Rumi
clearbluesky said
Yes real, this is the third thread I saw today about ploygamy in ...Islam. Hope atleast few are genuinely curious :)
Something is better than nothing but nothing is better than nonesense :p
Luckyjinx said
clearbluesky ...Appreciated!!! Tnx.
"Only in Dreams but Never in Reality"
akprinz said
both are having same rights ...Legendwar has stated short and true quote ...! I admit...it the same !
LEGENDWAR said
Thanx... ...Thankyou akprinz, for a step towards the truth.
NAZ
seny0rita said
i have filipino muslim ...i have filipino muslim friends..all the wives are to do the same duties and roles. oh, and they all should be treated equally by the husband too.
rafeeqcs said
no command ...Cindy, Its a long defenision needed subject.I am unable to explain its through Qatar Living site unless get a live discussion. So if u r intrested just inform me by msg..i will contact you with a lot of documents and proofs...what is happening here around us...bcz, only the reason some relegions are not permiting at all to keep one more wifes exept Islam. Islam is allowing to have more but should be under some reason which is to get more benefit for society. stopping now, if u want to learn more contact me. I am not intresting to discuss this more with others.
By rafee
edifis said
Role of second wife? To ...Role of second wife? To fight with first one, I guess.
There is nothing like a good Catfight!!!
Jut said
I have absolutly no desire ...I have absolutly no desire to judge people, or offend anybody, so I hope all will understand that my question is purely out of curiousity.
When a muslim man is married to more than one woman, how do the logistics work? does the man share a bed with all his wives? do they live in the same house? what about choosing who is to be a mother?
MagicDragon said
I have a Muslim girlfiend ...I have a Muslim girlfiend who is married. She considers to marry me as her second husband. I think she cannot do it, but she says men and women have equal rights.
qatman said
MD This is long but answers ...MD This is long but answers your rhetoric of men & women equality.
This widely held misconception does not remotely follow from the reasons given. The first and most important observation to make about the popular question "Are men and women equal?" is that it is a badly-formed, unanswerable question. The problem which many people conveniently ignore is that "equal" is not defined. This is a very critical point: the equality must be specified with respect to some measurable property. For example, women on average are superior to men if we ask who is shorter in height than the other ("Growth and Development", Encyclopaedia Britannica, 1992). Women are also superior on average if we ask whom do children bond to deeper, mothers or fathers. Women are also superior on average if we ask who has a tendency to socialize more. On the other hand, men are superior on average if we ask who is taller in height than the other. And so on: every question can be turned around, and more importantly these are properties which are irrelevant.
What then, is the really important property which we are worried about in terms of gender equality? Naturally, from the point of view of the Qur'an and Sunnah, the obvious important property is who is dearer to Allah, men or women? This question is emphatically answered in the Qur'an (translation),
[4:124] If any do deeds of righteousness - be they male or female - and have faith, they will enter Paradise, and not the least injustice will be done to them.
[33:35] For Muslim men and women, for believing men and women, for devout men and women, for truthful men and women, for men and women who are patient and constant, for men and women who humble themselves, for men and women who give in charity, for men and women who fast, for men and women who guard their chastity, and for men and women who engage much in Allah's praise, for them has Allah prepared forgiveness and great reward.
The Qur'an and Sunnah repeat over and over again that Allah only favors one person over another based on that person's awareness, consciousness, fear, love, and hope of Allah (the Arabic word is difficult to translate: Taqwa). All other criteria are excluded: gender, ethnic group, country, ancestry, etc.
Given that Allah does not favor one gender over the other in His attention to us (and it helps to remember that Allah is neither male nor female), we can now address the differences between the genders in Islam. First, men and women are not the same as we know. The Creator states in the Qur'an (translation),
[3:36]...and the male is not like the female...
Men and women are different in their composition, and in their responsibilities under Islam. However, both are bound by obligations to one another, especially the following important one which must be understood in any discussion on men and women. From the Qur'an (translation),
[24:32] And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, Knowing.
In this verse, the Creator emphasizes that marriage is to be vigorously pursued by the Muslims: the state of being single is not to be maintained. With this in mind, we can begin to understand the four reasons cited above for the nonetheless erroneous conclusion.
Men and women are different in their responsibilities towards the families that they are strongly encouraged to set up. Women are not obligated to work, whereas men are obligated. The man must provide for the family, but the woman does not have to spend out of her money for it, though she gets a reward for doing so. Allah says in the Qur'an (translation),
[4:34] Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath made the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High, Exalted, Great.
From the Sunnah, specifically in the study of the Sunnah called Sahih Bukhari, we find:
[2:24:545] Narrated `Amr bin Al-Harith: Zainab, the wife of `Abdullah said, "I was in the Mosque and saw the Prophet (p.b.u.h) saying, `O women ! Give alms even from your ornaments.' " Zainab used to provide for `Abdullah and those orphans who were under her protection. So she said to `Abdullah, "Will you ask Allah's Apostle whether it will be sufficient for me to spend part of the Zakat on you and the orphans who are under my protection?" He replied "Will you yourself ask Allah's Apostle ?" (Zainab added): So I went to the Prophet and I saw there an Ansari woman who was standing at the door (of the Prophet ) with a similar problem as mine. Bilal passed by us and we asked him, `Ask the Prophet whether it is permissible for me to spend (the Zakat) on my husband and the orphans under my protection.' And we requested Bilal not to inform the Prophet about us. So Bilal went inside and asked the Prophet regarding our problem. The Prophet (p.b.u.h) asked, "Who are those two?" Bilal replied that she was Zainab. The Prophet said, "Which Zainab?" Bilal said, "The wife of `Adullah (bin Masud)." The Prophet said, "Yes, (it is sufficient for her) and she will receive a double rewards (for that): One for helping relatives, and the other for giving Zakat."
Given that husbands are obligated to provide for wives, and that marriage is a highly recommended goal of Islam, it is easy to see why women's inheritance share is half that of men. We note also that men are obligated to provide a suitable dowry to women on marriage. In fact, it is preferable at this point to speak in terms of husbands and wives instead of men and women. Allah says in the Qur'an (translation),
[4:4] And give women their dowries as a free gift, but if they of themselves be pleased to give up to you a portion of it, then eat it with enjoyment and with wholesome result.
Allah says in the Qur'an (translation),
[2:228]...And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them in kindness, and men are a degree above them...
This one degree in no way affects the position of the Creator in which He has stated that He does not hold women dearer to him than men, or vice versa. Rather it is simply a way of partitioning responsibilities in a household of two adults: someone must make the final decision on daily matters. As will be shown below in a section on a different misconception, though the final decision rests with the husband, it is through mutual consultation that decisions are best reached at.
While men are allowed to marry up to four wives, they are also commanded to meet the preconditions of being able to financially support them. They must also deal with each wife justly and fairly with respect to marital and economic obligations. Allah says in the Qur'an (translation),
[4:3] If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.
Moreover, women are allowed to reject any marriage proposal made to her by prospective suitors, thus if she does not feel she can abide by the rules of the Qur'an and Sunnah if she marries a certain person, she can reject his proposal. While it is irrelevant to Islam, it is worthwhile to note that both Judaism and Christianity allow polygamy. The idea is not as foreign to the non-Muslims as is often claimed.
Finally, the wearing of the veil by women is also an illogical premise to claim that women are inferior to men. It is more appropriate to indict a society of female exploitation if it tolerates pornography rather than if it enforces the veil. Given that Allah is neither male nor female, given that He does not endear people to Himself based on their gender, given that the Creator cares about all of us male or female, given that the sexual and violent drive of men is stronger than that of women...given all this, it is illogical to cast a negative light on the following injunctions contained in the Qur'an (translation),
[33:59] O Prophet, tell your wives and daughters and the believing women to draw their outer garments around them (when they go out or are among men). That is better in order that they may be known (to be Muslims) and not be annoyed...
[24:30-31] Say to the believing man that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that will make for greater purity for them; and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; and that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what must ordinarily appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands...
On this misconception, there is a great deal more to write, most of it showing how current practices in many Muslim lands go against what the Qur'an and Sunnah have ordained, lands in which women are treated as property (unIslamic), are not educated (unIslamic), are forbidden their economic rights (unIslamic), and more. On this point in particular, we encourage everyone to consult the Qur'an and Sunnah before incriminating Islam. Always remember that Islam is a complete way of life from the Creator, and that Muslims are people who claim to follow that way of life. A Muslim may claim to follow Islam, but be wrong.
Source: http://www.usc.edu/d...
MagicDragon said
Qatman, thank you for your ...Qatman, thank you for your long comment. Please don't misunderstand me. I love my wife and I would never think of marrying a second one, because I love her. If any religion would allow me to do that I would rather obstain from that religion than to obstain from my love. But, thank you for your efforts.
Aisha-Taweela said
Thank you for your effort on ...Thank you for your effort on the above post Qatman. But how many will understand it and how many will turn it,twist it, and give their silly answers?
Hope more people would understand the reasonings and the why that Allah has given us in the Quran & Sunnah. It is all so straight forward and self explanatory. Like the text you gave us.
Aisha-Taweela
qatman said
Thanks MD, Allows does not ...Thanks MD, Allows does not mean must or you have to, it’s an option.
edifis said
Qatman, You are a ...Qatman, You are a marvel!
From your profile I found out that you are an IT guy from India. Being an IT guy, your knowledge on Religion is just amazing! I also read your post regarding what Qur'an says regarding formation of the Human Embryo. I have very scant knowledge regarding Human Anatomy, so I can neither agree nor disagree to what you said in that post. But still whatever you said seems to be very thorough and comprehensive and nobody seems to have any better logic to contradict you.
Your posts are really interesting. So keep posting on religious topics.