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Latest news from Qatar
Cleric married to 12 year old girl

Cleric defiant amid controversy over marriage to 12-year-old girl
Suherdjoko , The Jakarta Post , Semarang | Sat, 10/25/2008 1:02 PM | The Archipelago
The marriage of an underage girl to a wealthy Muslim cleric in Bedono village, Semarang regency, Central Java, has sparked controversy in the community.
A Muslim boarding school head, 43-year-old Pujiono Cahyo, known also as Syech Puji, married 12-year-old Lutfiana Ulfa at his home on August 8. He told reporters Friday that the wedding ceremony, held at 3 p.m. local time, was witnessed by thousands of guests.
"The wedding was carried out openly. If people want to comment, please do. I don't care about the legal threats because I have my own basic reasons. I know the limitations. If she hasn't menstruated, I won't have sexual intercourse with her," said Puji.
Puji is the director of PT Sinar Lendoh Terang and owner of the Miftahul Jannah boarding school, an impressive building along the highway between Semarang and Yogyakarta. Apparently his first wife, 26-tear-old Umi Hani, was the one who suggested he marry again.
"She was the one who proposed it. Then, a campaign team went looking for a prospective wife. So, not only politicians have campaign teams," he added jokingly.
He said he met Ulfa's parents for their consent and that Ulfa had also agreed to the marriage.
"So, what have I done wrong? My reasons stem from a book titled Aisyah Saja Nikah Muda (Aisyah Herself Married Young), written by Ummu Aisyah."
Puji revealed his intention to marry for a second time to reporters on Sept. 26, when he distributed Rp 1.3 billion (US$140,000) in tithes for the poor during the Ramadan fasting month.
An ulema at the Soko Tunggal Islamic boarding school in Semarang, Nuril Arifin Husein, strongly criticized Puji's marriage to the girl.
"If he claims to be a syech, which means professor, he should be a role model for the community. In Islam, a marriage should be a union of the same stature. What he has done is clearly against Islamic law," said Nuril.
"However, Prophet Muhammad only had intercourse with Aisyah when she had reached 18, meaning she was an adult. If Puji has sex with an underage girl, he will have violated religious and existing laws," he said.
Sri Mulyanah from Central Java Women's Empowerment and Children Rights and Family Planning Agency, said Puji violated the 1974 Marriage Law which requires a minimum age of 16 for a woman and 19 for a man in a legal marriage.
"If we look at the marriage and child protection laws, what Puji has done is definitely against the law. We will immediately discuss the issue with the relevant agencies and observe the case from various aspects. Later, we will decide on the appropriate action," she said.
Sri said children were entitled to the right to live, grow and develop while being provided with protection and participative rights.
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realsomeone said
updated ...never mind.
Poverty is not for the sake of hardship. No, it is there because nothing exists but God. Poverty unlocks the door -- what a blessed key!
- Jalaluddin al-Rumi
Alexa said
And people like that are ...And people like that are allowed to run boarding schools??? Oh my.....
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
MagicDragon said
This guy is cool. All he ...This guy is cool. All he does is using the 'loop holes' that laws provide.
AbuAmerican said
uh.. yea I'm lost on this ...uh.. yea I'm lost on this one.
______________________________________________
Brazilian Jujitsu in Qatar
http://iloveqatar.ne...
dmigtysolomon said
it just sucks,.... ...one young soul destroyed again.
"dgoodrebel will always be the rebellious good one"
lovelyurs_2008 said
that shocking ...but i guess thats common already...
Alexa said
Abu...why are you lost? An ...Abu...why are you lost? An old man marries a child....pretty clear to me...
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
Winn said
"If she hasn't menstruated, ..."If she hasn't menstruated, I won't have sexual intercourse with her," said Puji.-
How magnanimous of him!!
Paedophile is the word, I guess.
------------------------------------------------
“Live life so completely that when death comes to you like a thief in the night, there will be nothing left for him to steal.”
AbuAmerican said
its a variation of the ...its a variation of the statement "I'm at a loss for words".
______________________________________________
Brazilian Jujitsu in Qatar
http://iloveqatar.ne...
Alexa said
Abu..ah, sorry, did not get ...Abu..ah, sorry, did not get it eh first time....:0
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
koolkat said
Hmmmmmm ...well......to me,its no news.I av seen dis happened before
China Syndrome said
Quite simple .................... ...A case of different religions, different values.
In the eyes of Muslims, interpretation of the Koran is obviously open to debate, and this is probably perfectly right for some, including the girls family from all accounts.
For the rest of the World, same old, same old!!!!!
As far as I am concerned, religion apart, he's a dirty old Paedophile !!
diamond said
Interfering with them is ...Interfering with them is exactly what he is doing. Poor girls. Another word is PAEDOPHILIA.
-------------------------------------

american_muslim said
Not sure what to think ...I do not know what to think. I live in the US and I see 12 year-old girls having babies all the time it is kind of the norm here and the their families are letting this happen. So what I am thinking is that if and only if the girl says that she is ready to be married do you allow it to happen. The man that married this girl was not thinking too much for the welfare of this girl. The age is too different. I think that the girls family should of thought more about that. He will be dead or very old while she is so very young. I think part of the loving process is growing old together and she will not have that.
qwertyness said
Ok first- where on earth in ...Ok first- where on earth in the states are you living that 12 year old girls with babies is so common you could call it the norm??? i just moved here and i have to tell you, in Canada at least, a pregnant 12 year old would raise MORE than a few eyebrows!
Also, I don't buy any of that religious tripe- it's a justification for a crime that will cause long term damages to the CHILD involved. I don't care if she 'agreed'- she's a child. she cannot agree or give consent, she can't POSSIBLY understand the full ramifications of what she's doing.
Furthermore, do you really think she could make a decision or her own? NO. there would be pressures from all sorts of authority figures that would remove any chance of her making a logical and rational decision.
Regardless of the laws or customs of that country or community, the International rights of the child and human decency do apply, and this is just wrong.
logicsays said
Whatever the law says what this man did is acceptable ...according to Shariaa Law so I think he believes he is not in breach of any law ....
"The best way to predict the future is to create it".
Arien said
Cut his Veins .. You know ...Cut his Veins .. You know which ones i meant.
______________________________________________
Live,
Let Live,
& Help Live..
heero_yuy2 said
And to think the girl hadn't had her first period yet ..."Everything in this book may be wrong." Illusions: The Adventures of The Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach
ringohiqups said
perv... tosser.... ...perv... tosser....
svelte_saggi said
he's crazy..... Keep ...he's crazy.....
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
Rizks said
CRAP ....... :( ...CRAP ....... :(
Eco-savvy said
Height of pervertism ...in the name of religion
Andrews said
paedophile...whatelse... ...paedophile...whatelse...
sag said
There is nothing wrong with ...There is nothing wrong with such a marriage among muslims but what worries is that the girl will be still young when her husband grows older or dies. This situation was handled in early islamic era when there were no problems for women getting married next. Now muslims have preferential Islam that makes remarriage very hard. As there is no unanimity in the interpretation of the Islamic law these incidents take place as they enjoy equal support and prtection to criticism. There apparently is no way for the wise people than to burn their heads!
QFire said
Yeah Sag .. He's still a paedophile ...No matter what veil he hides behind
logicsays said
What is Shariaa Law saying on age for marriage? ..."The best way to predict the future is to create it".
QFire said
A paedophile is a paedophile no matter what law you choose ...to hide behind.
He's also a dirty old man. Probably ugly and desparate so he has to pick on children and abuse his power over them.
He probably also has bad breath and body odour as no woman with a free choice will waste time with him.
qwertyness said
frankly, I don't care what ...frankly, I don't care what Shariaa law or Islam says: this is JUST WRONG. This man, and anyone who defends him, is using their own interpretations of their religion to commit A CRIME.
It is not alright for that little girl to lose her childhood because, well hey, muslims in the past did it it must be alright. Is she going to get to finish school? Have a career? Have friends? Experience life and love and all the other things that come with being allowed to be a child and grow up? No, instead she will be repeatedly raped by a man old enough to be her father, and spend her life pregnant.
i'm sorry, but i just can't think of ANY God who'd be ok with that.
labda06 said
Arien, I think they should ...Arien, I think they should first cut some other "things" as well.
This is what happens when good men do nothing.
--------------------- N.O.W --------------------------
Kareena74 said
It is allowed ...I just now that legally it is allowed in Islam according to the Shariha law.. Our prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) married Ayesha when he was in his fifties and she was just 9 BUT she did not come to stay with him till she reached puberty at the age of 12 or something..
In Islam, muslim men are told to marry of their daughters as soon as they reach puberty so that they don't go around experimenting..
svelte_saggi said
'experimenting'?????ROFL..... ...'experimenting'?????ROFL......
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
qwertyness said
ok that is all well and ...ok that is all well and good. But when was Mohammed around? oh yeah HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO. Plus he was a freaking prophet which means the rules are a little different for him, yah?
WHat i'm saying here is we REALLY, as a human society, should have gotten past marrying off children by now. We know the harm it does to them, we value human life and experience, especially female identity, now and understand girls are more than just baby making factories to be sold in marriage by their fathers and exploited by horny old men.....
right?
RED_POPE said
QWERTYNESS ...What i hate the most, How they manipulate Religion either Christian or Islamic to cover-up their evilness.
“Be fearful when others are greedy, and be greedy when others are fearful,”
qwertyness said
yup. I do not care what ...yup. I do not care what stripe you are, i have the same problems with muslims, mormons, catholics WHATEVER:
it's a simple rule. Don't. Have sex. With CHILDREN.
QFire said
Just because you made a mistake and was a paedophile in the past ...doesn't make it right today!
If it's wrong, it's wrong, no matter how many times you or anyone else commits the crime. We are not animals or are some of us?
Imagine if you were married off as a kid and all your friends laughed at you because you were paedophiled by a dirty old man with bad breath, body odor and excesive body hair. How do you think you'd feel? Full of self esteem?
QFire said
Just because you made a mistake and was a paedophile in the past ...doesn't make it right today!
If it's wrong, it's wrong, no matter how many times you or anyone else commits the crime. We are not animals or are some of us?
Imagine if you were married off as a kid and all your friends laughed at you because you were paedophiled by a dirty old man with bad breath, body odor and excesive body hair. How do you think you'd feel? Full of self esteem?
Gypsy said
Agree with Qwertyness 100%. ...Agree with Qwertyness 100%. You married off kids at 12 1600 years ago cause the averge person died at 35/40. Average age of death now is 70's or 80's. No need to marry off so young.
omarsk said
should be castrated... ...should be castrated... honestly.
omarsk said
as in b**ls cut off... ...as in b**ls cut off...
Muhandis said
Guys.. ...What age is considered as adult in western society? I heard in Netherland it is 16, isn't it? What about other countries? Does it change over time? Just curious...
Muhandis said
I found this ...in one of hotels in Swiss:
"Children age 11 and under stay free in the room with parents and in existing bedding. Children over this age will be considered an adult" LOL!!!
svelte_saggi said
muhandis.... ...guess the age to be considered an adult changes from country to country.....LOL!how idiotic!
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
Kareena74 said
In Western countries ...Teen pregnancy is so common in western countries.. So many unwed mothers out there on the streets.. Then why do people lambast Muslims when they are doing something absolutely halal... Don't you think it is better to be married and have a legimate child at 13 instead of being an unwed mother giving birth to a B----d?
logicsays said
Muhandis .. treating a child above 11 as adult for hotel and air ...ticket purposes does not mean they can get married, does it?
Do I understand from your post that you approve marriage of a 9 year old girl?
"The best way to predict the future is to create it".
svelte_saggi said
why don't people have the ...why don't people have the common sense to understand that a female body is not yet prepared to bear a child at such a young age!hell,even her reproductive organs aren't fully developed,for God's sake!marrying her off and expecting her to bear a child at that age is equivalent to killing the girl!both physically and emotionally.....it's crazy!
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
logicsays said
Kareena if the west was Ok with that they would have allowed ...them to get married at this age wouldn't they?
"The best way to predict the future is to create it".
Kareena74 said
Teenage birth highest in the United States ...The teenage birth rate in the United States is the highest in the developed world, and the teenage abortion rate is also high.[3] The U.S. teenage pregnancy rate was at a high in the 1950s and has decreased since then, although there has been an increase in births out of wedlock.[11] The teenage pregnancy rate decreased significantly in the 1990s; this decline manifested across all racial groups, although teenagers of African-American and Hispanic descent retain a higher rate, in comparison to that of European-Americans and Asian-Americans. The Guttmacher Institute attributed about 25% of the decline to abstinence and 75% to the effective use of contraceptives.[12] [13] However, as of 2006 the teenage birth rate began to rise once again for the first time in fourteen years.[14] This could imply that teen pregnancy rates are also on the rise, however the rise could also be due to other sources: a possible decrease in the number of abortions or a decrease in the number of miscarraiges, to name a few. The Canadian teenage birth has also trended towards a steady decline for both younger (15-17) and older (18-19) teens in the period between 1992-2002.[15]
svelte_saggi said
these statistics just prove ...these statistics just prove how less influence the family has on the children.....coz if it was legal then,as logicsays said,it would be legalised all over the world.
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
Kareena74 said
Teenage girls get pregnant by older men in US ...According to the Family Research Council, studies in the US indicate that age discrepancy between the teenage girls and the men who impregnate them is an important contributing factor. Teenage girls in relationships with older boys, and in particular with adult men, are more likely to become pregnant than teenage girls in relationships with boys their own age. They are also more likely to carry the baby to term rather than have an abortion. A review of California's 1990 vital statistics found that men older than high school age fathered 77 percent of all births to high school-aged girls (ages 16-18), and 51 percent of births to junior high school-aged girls (15 and younger). Men over age 25 fathered twice as many children of teenage mothers than boys under age 18, and men over age 20 fathered five times as many children of junior high school-aged girls as did junior high school-aged boys. A 1992 Washington state study of 535 adolescent mothers found that 62 percent of the mothers had a history of being raped or sexual molested by men whose ages averaged 27 years. This study found that, compared with nonabused mothers, abused adolescent mothers initiated sex earlier, had sex with much older partners, and engaged in riskier, more frequent, and promiscuous sex. Studies by the Population Reference Bureau and the National Center for Health Statistics found that about two-thirds of children born to teenage girls in the United States are fathered by adult men age 20 or older.[28]
logicsays said
Kareena .. your article quotes teenage girls as 15 to 19 not 12 ...so even the west who you are referring to are seeing those numbers among girls who may be 15 or above ..
I still they condem it ...
"The best way to predict the future is to create it".
Alexa said
Kareena, if Islam/Muslims ...Kareena, if Islam/Muslims care so much about the well being of mother and child,to marry them off to be taken care of, shouldn't they also care about not treating the girl as an adult when she clearly is not one ?
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
logicsays said
The Somali Stoned Girl was 13 & was raped .... no comment ... ..."The best way to predict the future is to create it".
Muhandis said
Logicsays... ...It's not important whether I approve it or not. But I am still curious about the "cut off age" for adult in other countries / societies. Hmm I hope people get my point
logicsays said
lets see, what is the approved age for marriage at your country? ...lets share the legal age for marriage at differnt countries and see how they compare to other countries...
"The best way to predict the future is to create it".
sag said
Kareena, logicsays.. Would ...Kareena, logicsays..
Would you marry your 12 yr old daughter to a 40 yr old man?
PM, Alexa (I presume muslims), etc
For God's sake would you say What Prophet himself did was wrong?
Don't burn your heads...
Formatted Soul said
In India legal age for ...In India legal age for marriage is 18 for girls and 21 for boys.
master_mas said
the age where the girl turn ...the age where the girl turn into a woman varies from place to place, from country to country & from race to race..
.
women grow faster in hot places that cold places, faster in low pressure areas than high pressure areas, & they grow faster if they were conceived at a young age..
.
in Saudi Arabia for EXAMPLE.. only EXAMPLE.. just sayin it.. there are 12 or 13 years old girls who r fully developed & can get pregnant & have children & rase them in FULL health without any trouble..
.
but see in Russia for EXAMPLE.. girls turn into women at around 16 & 17 years old.. ..
..
what i just said is Scientificly Proved.. u can check it out..
..
i ain't defendin anyone.. just telling the truth..
Alexa said
Their bodies being ready ...Their bodies being ready does not mean that their minds are too.
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
svelte_saggi said
alexa.... ...well-said......whether their bodies are fully grown or not,their minds are still childish at 12 and 13....IMHO
Keep smiling!
Saggi!
master_mas said
ya.. now a days they r like ...ya.. now a days they r like that.. just kids.. even boys..
before .. way back in time.. they used to go to war at that age.. they used to lead armies.. human beings r growing backward..
omarsk said
this is absolutely ...this is absolutely disguisting...
qwertyness said
OK just because a girl CAN ...OK just because a girl CAN produce a child without dying DOESN'T mean she should. i agree completely with the people who said she is not mentally or emoitoanlly ready at that age!
Also, at that young age, NO girl can consent to sex. i'M SORRY, they are CHILDREN and any sexual relations, ESPECIALLY with someone in a position of authority over them (and that means adults) is RAPE. pure and simple. so basically what people are arguing here is religious and legally sanctioned rape, and that is shamefull.
as for all the teen pregnancy in the west- those girls are older. they consented for the most part, they made mistakes, but THEY were in control of their bodies. In the case of child brides, they lose that control, it's taken away from them, and that is horrible. We've grown as a society where women can be in cahrge of their bodies and their lives, or we should have. why do we place such a high premium on being 'taken care of'? It's my opinon that regardless of if a 16 year old girl has a baby out of wedlock or in, she's still wasted her life in most cases. the child may not be a bastard (what does that matter anyway?) but the mother has still thrown away her own life and opportunities, regardless if she's shackled herself to a husband.
also, Iknow many women who are BETTER OFF having children without being married- sometimes men aren't ready to be fathers, but that doesn't mean a woman can't be a mother. but that's an entirely different topic :)
narainbabu said
better he could have married his own daughter ...stupidity. 12 years old girl whether she is grown up or not her mind is still a childish. and that too a 40 year old man she agreed to marry means her parents might have got bundle of currency. at the age of 12 what she can decide and what she knew about marriage. it is absolutely stupdity in this new generation. i think pleting stone is enough punishment. public of his country should come forward and throw stone.
mayamkhob said
That is why, Sharia laws ...That is why, Sharia laws must be reviewed. This does not mean harm to Islam, its just the natural reform. Omer Ibn Khattab did reforms after a few years of Prophet's passing away. Please Wake Up.
Existence is a heavy burden, only high spirited ones can bear it.
qwertyness said
you know what, reforming ...you know what, reforming Sharia law would probably actually HELP Islam, at least insofar as the perception by the non-islamic world goes. It's using relgiion as justifications for crimes like this that give Islam a bad name.
Winn said
My 2c ...Consent: Legally, at least in India, and logically,to me, sex with a minor is RAPE. Period.Question of consent doesnot arise in case of minors.
Abt quoting US statistics of teenage pregnancy: When did US become a role model?Whether its happening in US or not, its jus plain wrong according to their own values and legal system and is seen as a disturbing trend.
Also How does the fact that it happens in US by anymeans justify underage marriage?
There are much better things to be done in the teens than marriage. Education for instance. It is the right of every individual to be allowed to try n grow to what they dream to be. Not what their parents, clergy or relegion wants em to be.
-----------------------------------------------
“Live life so completely that when death comes to you like a thief in the night, there will be nothing left for him to steal.”
qwertyness said
and I'm sorry, getting ...and I'm sorry, getting married will NOT make them any safer, or help them take care of THEMSELVES (I reject the notion women need a husband or father to take care of her) than teens who don't.
and if you're so worried about teen pregnancy, SURELY marrying them off to horny old men who's whole point is to get them pregnant and breed them like underage cattle sort of defeats the purpose, right?
american_muslim said
well my daughter is 14 and ...well my daughter is 14 and yes I would rather see her married than be one of these girls just letting herself be used. You can not say that girls do not need men in their life. Now I am not saying that this 40 year old man was the best choice but I rather see that than see her having a b-----d child with some little boy that is not even able to take care of himself. I wish that there was a younger choice for her but if she wanted this it is alright. My thing is did she really want this or did her father push this on her
qwertyness said
I think you're forgetting a ...I think you're forgetting a third option there american muslim- NOT getting pregnant! It's not a choice between having a bastard (what IS the big deal anyway? Lots of women ahve kids without having a husband.......) or getting married. At 14, I think it's too young for either. And girls shoudl be educated to protect themselves- and that doesn't mean being restricted to simply abstinence education. all that leads to is A LOT more teen pregnancy than there needs to be! I think if the USA were a little more free and easy with the handing out of the condoms their teen pregnancy rates would be lower....
let's allow our girls to be full, functioning people, giving them the education and support to make their own choices!
Alexa said
qwertyness...what does this ...qwertyness...what does this thread/article have to do with the US?
As far as I am aware, those things are common in countries other than the US....this is not about teen pregnancy, this is about marrying a child off to a middle aged man...who, on top of everything is allowed to care for children, as in running a boarding school.
Corrct me if I am wrong.
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
qwertyness said
sorry I got sidetracked- ...sorry I got sidetracked- somoen made a post further up about teen pregnancy stats, and it sort of went off on a tangent about how it was better for girls to be married off young to avoid those things.
Alexa said
qwertyness, that stuff ...qwertyness, that stuff always comes up in threads where certain things are talked about.....some people just don't like it when light is shed on "practices", "customs" and such.
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
Pieman said
Strange how one man´s ...Strange how one man´s peodphile is another man´s religeous rights
just eat another pie
Dracula said
good point pieman! ...DoraTheExplorer said
mmmm thats called bending ...mmmm thats called bending the rules.....
Platao36 said
hmmmm, a 12 y old girl ...hmmmm, a 12 y old girl proposed him to marry and he's very wealthy right? Guess what he meant was that the girl's family has no money and he offered them some, all she needed to do would be marrying him and say that she's the one in love.
Seams perfectly clear to me. ;)
==========
Kareena74: Lots of pregnant teens, with 12 y? Dunno where you live but i can assure you that some teens get pregnant but mostly at 16 and the father isn't a 47 y old guy. Legal age at Portugal is 18.
Only God Can Judge Me
الله فقط يمكنه محاكمتي
I am you and you are me, if you love i love, if you suffer i suffer
أنا أنت, و أنت أنا, إذا أحببت نفسك أحببت نفسي, إذا عانيتَ عانيتُ
adnanmzfr said
There should be a law ...There should be a law prohibiting under aged marriages.
On the other hand marriage is every one's own personal matter.
nigelreid said
this is exactly ...this is EXACTLY why we need human / secular laws which are NOT based on religion.
Some rules of religion contradict morality, common sense or even modern taste, and therefore we need to put it aside and accept that it is not relevant in all cases. This man is hiding behind religious rules to do something that is disgusting and revolting. A 40 year old in bed with a 12 year old. Gees, it makes me sick.
And as for allowing him to marry two more girls, is even further example of how religion is out of date and inappropriate as a source of law for our modern times.
nigelreid said
the point is that "marriage" ...the point is that "marriage" in the religious sense is essentially no different to a casual relationship
a man can marry numerous wives, consummate the marriage, then divorce his wives and find new ones. All within the legal framework or religion. He might even be worthy of applause if he does so.
But two people have casual sex, break up and move on, and it is a "decadent, evil, illicit, wicked practice" which degrades society.
There is a mass delusion creeping across the face of this planet, and I don't know where it will end.
And another thing, I am heartily sick of all the triumphalist pro-religious threads on this website.
Scotiabank said
only a twisted perverted ...only a twisted perverted idiot would marry a girl so young.
Platao36 said
I'm sure that when the ...I'm sure that when the Shariah gets updated, will be harder to use religion as excuse to such acts
Only God Can Judge Me
الله فقط يمكنه محاكمتي
I am you and you are me, if you love i love, if you suffer i suffer
أنا أنت, و أنت أنا, إذا أحببت نفسك أحببت نفسي, إذا عانيتَ عانيتُ
adnanmzfr said
In religious sense marriage ...In religious sense marriage is the legal form of contract or agreement between man and woman in which both of them agree in front of the society concerned. So it is something annouced in legal terms and not hidden. No one can object on that becasue both agree and one way or the other it is announced that they can now have the legal relationship from that point on.
So there cannot be comparison of getting married more thab once and having a casual relationships without any commitment , they are very different. In summary marriage is very different to casual relashionship even if man married more once as mentioned.Even if his act may not be perfect but no one can say that any such has broken the rules of morality.
Alexa said
Adnan, yes, one CAN say ...Adnan, yes, one CAN say that...particularly if a middle aged man marries a child. That IS immoral, no matter what.
You mess with the cat, you get the claws....
adnanmzfr said
Yes an underaged marriage ...Yes an underaged marriage should not be allowed because a child cannot express his will untill he or she is an adult and come of age. In this sense it is not moral for that man to marry a 12 year old girl.
nigelreid said
Secular morality ...One flaw with religion is that society expects everyone to follow a 'moral code' inherited from the ancients, in which the act of marriage is the only acceptable way to have sex. So, you can marry multiple times, get multiple divorces, marry underage, you can even beat your wife, just so long as you use the magic word MARRIAGE then you're fine and no-one is allowed to criticise you. But if you have a casual ('illicit') relationship, in some parts of the world you are to be deemed a criminal and should be locked up even though you have not hurt anyone at all.
This kind of situation shows clearly that it is necessary to renegotiate traditional ideas of morality to suit existing problems. Secular societies which have done this usually agree on one essential thing: what human laws must do is to prevent HARM from being done, not whether it is in accordance with some ancient system of 'morality' that everybody happens to accept because they are forbidden to negotiate it or change it - those who try to receive all kinds of insults and threats - even up to death threats.
But what if a society said, look it's none of our business who you have consensual sex with, as such, but what we are VERY concerned about is HARM being caused to others. So, we will make it illegal for sexual acts with those under a certain age to take place because the welfare of children under a certain age is damaged by sexual interference by older adults.
Taking 'harm' as the guiding force for lawmaking in the modern world, and setting aside 'traditional morality', will actually free us up to A) respect individual choices and preferences regardless of what we do or don't believe; B) address modern scenarios and problems; C) improve the essentially flawed nature of traditional moral codes which do not always prevent HARM from being done (in fact, they cause far more harm than they do good, in my view.)
adnanmzfr said
Well what the word morality ...Well what the word morality teaches in a religion is only is to actually prevent harm done to the people in the society. For example if secular law is not prohibiting the act of adultry then lot of homes will suffer and marriages will break, people will be harmed.T Adultry (or casual relationship)is by defination is a relahionship out side marraige and cannot be graded as a marriage what so ever may be becasue in marriage you are setting up the boundaries.
All other issues are one's personal and there is a rule defined to exercise it. No one in the society marries and divorce again and again as one cannot afford it. There may be very few exceptions in this regard but still this is not an act appreciated by others.
MagicDragon said
And I tell you, adnan, that ...And I tell you, adnan, that it is much easier and cheaper in Islam to divorce than in Germany according to the law. So, who is "protecting" society?
UkEngQatar said
MD you might be wrong..The ...MD you might be wrong..The idea is who benefits..Germany plus other european countries who really benefits from the divorce procedures the lawyers ofcource its a win win situation for themm..
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HE WHO DARES WINS
MagicDragon said
I didn't talk about the ...I didn't talk about the cost. It is much harder than in Islam because you have to have a reason. And the court does not accept what Sharia courts accept. I know, I went through a divorce.
UkEngQatar said
same here mate been there ...same here mate been there done it..Know how it goes..it just what I hear her that it is more difficult here if they would really apply they laws..just a observation
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HE WHO DARES WINS