Wonderfully described definitions.......

Love it!

Don't let Timebandit see the 'MARRIAGE' one.....he'll want to bring the date forward!! :)

'Up there for thinking....down there for dancing.'

Accountant - someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

Ambassador : An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of his country.

Anonymous : The worlds most popular author.

Antique: an item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of, and you're buying again.

Appendix -a portion of a book, for which nobody yet has discovered any use.

Baby : A loud voice at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.

Baby-sitter: a teenager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teenagers.

Bank - a place that will lend you money if you can prove you don't need it.

Beauty : The power with which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Boss: A person who comes early to see who comes late.

Bus: A vehicle that runs faster when you run after it and runs slowly when you are inside it.

Capital Punishment: Killing people who kill people to prove that killing people is wrong.

Cheque Book: A book with unhappy ending.

Chickens: the only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

College: the four year period when parents are permitted access to the telephone.

Conference: the confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Conference: A meeting of bored people.

Criminal: A guy no different from the rest of us except that he got caught.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Conclusion : What you reach when you're tired of thinking.

Conscience: the thing which hurts when everything else feels good.

Consciousness: the annoying time between naps.

Creator: a comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh.

Cynic: a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.

Diet : a brief period of starvation followed by a gain of five pounds.

Diplomacy : The art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock.

Diplomat: a person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward for the trip.

Divorce: future tense of marriage.

Divorce lawyer: a lawyer whose primary responsibility is to make sure you get half and he gets the other half.

Doctor: a person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Earth: A small planet with major problems.

Education : is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence.

Etc.: a sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Exam: Where foolish asks questions which wise cannot answer.

Experience : the name men give to their mistakes.

Father: a banker provided by the nature.

Fiction: the story told by a completed income tax form.

Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries

Group discussion: a place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Justice : A decision in your favor.

Keyboard: the standard way to generate computer errors.

Kitchen: Final laboratory of women.

Laziness: the habit of resting before you get tired.

Life: a sexually transmitted disease with 100% fatality rate.

Love: Temporary insanity curable by marriage.

Miser: a person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

Mosquito: an insect that makes you like flies better.

Old Age: When you wink at a girl and she says, “Anything wrong with your eyes, Uncle?”

Optimist: 1) A person who, while falling from Eiffel tower, says in midway "see, I am not injured yet." 2)Unborn pessimist

Patriotism: the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons dreamed up by politicians.

Politician: 1) salespeople who sell voter's dreams but deliver only nightmares. 2) One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

Politics: Business of uneducated and jobless people.

Prices: The only thing, which violates the law of gravity.

Psychologist: a man who watches everyone else when a beautiful girl enters the room.

Rumor: 1) news that travels at the speed of sound. 2) sound which travels faster than light.

School teacher: a disillusioned person who used to think he liked children.

Secret: information you distribute to one person at a time.

Selfish: annoying quality of someone who has what I want, but is not prepared to give it to me.

Smile: a curve of the mouth that can set a lot of things straight.

Swimming pool: a mob of people with water in it.

Tattoo: permanent proof of temporary insanity.

Tears: the hydraulic force by which masculine power is defeated by feminine power.

Tomorrow: one of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

Valentine's day: A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card

Consultant: Someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

No one knows how it is that one glance a boy can break through into a girl's heart
N Bonaparte

sorry buddy, i'm not native english, can't get TSF. :P

No one knows how it is that one glance a boy can break through into a girl's heart
N Bonaparte

Dot.comu its Thanks For Sharing, but not in the oxford . ;D
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- Listen to Many...Speak to a Few -

Dot.com this TIG :)

am thru with it Dot.com. Its a weekend buddy , wher the heck is ma glasssss...lol
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- Listen to Many...Speak to a Few -

pajju, whats up buddy?

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

Dot.com sorry maybe next week .. coz my makeup set over .. have to buy newone

rein as usual honey ... after longtime .. how u doing?

lol
better today u watch the little master in action, he's with 50 for 47, and aiming to dismiss aussies :)

No one knows how it is that one glance a boy can break through into a girl's heart
N Bonaparte

lol Arien ok am free now :P call :)

lol
something is better than nothing :)

No one knows how it is that one glance a boy can break through into a girl's heart
N Bonaparte

Oh MY - Sachin on FIRE , after completing his 17000 runs.
92 from 71 balls 10 fours and 3 sixes...batting
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- Listen to Many...Speak to a Few -