European Commission

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

Using fossil fuel in vehicles is better for the environment than so-called green fuels made from crops, according to a government study seen by The Times.

The findings show that the Department for Transport’s target for raising the level of biofuel in all fuel sold in Britain will result in millions of acres of forest being logged or burnt down and converted to plantations. The study, likely to force a review of the target, concludes that some of the most commonly-used biofuel crops fail to meet the minimum sustainability standard set by the European Commission.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English' .

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. This will sertainly make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

Climate change presents a threat to beer

Could this be the piece of news that makes climate change sceptics alter their outlook on the future of the planet?

Whether global warming is a man-made phenomenon or part of Earth's natural cycle is a question that needs to be put to one side now. Great brains must focus on the real impact of the global temperature change, especially now that the world's beer supply is under threat.

Scientists in the Czech Republic have announced that the quality of Saaz hops - the variety used specifically to make pilsner lager - has been decreasing in recent years.

Climate change in the form of increased air temperature is, the scientists say, the main culprit.

Time for us to send in the navy methinks !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They've tried invasion, diplomacy and downright skulduggery to grab a piece of Gibraltar during the past 300 years.

But now the Spanish have played their trump card by laying claim to 20 square miles of sea around the Rock...in the name of the environment.

And it seems to have worked – for the moment, at least. For the EU has granted Spain legal rights over British waters surrounding Gibraltar.

But the move has sparked protests from Britain and the Gibraltar government and led to a confrontation between Royal Navy and Spanish warships.