MEN OF SUBSTANCE

Top 10 Shocking Findings of the Independent Probe Conducted on the Alabang Boys Bribery Scandal
10: The Alabang Boys were actually fraternal triplets.
9: When Alabang boy Jorge Joseph (son of Johnny Midnight) was nabbed by PDEA agents, he was carrying three liters of toning water.
8: Tim Yap and his Embassy friends are regular visitors of the Alabang Boys at the PDEA detention cell bringing with them big placards that say: “Justice for the Alabang Boys, Justice for All Social Users!”
7: The parents of the Alabang Boys were loyal clients of DOJ Prosecutor John Resado’s lending business.
6: The controversial DOJ letterhead where the release order was drafted by one of the lawyers of the Alabang Boys (for the DOJ Secretary to sign) is being sold in Recto Avenue, Manila for years.
5: There was a fourth Alabang Boy, and a fifth, a sixth, a seventh, an eight, a ninth, a 10th, an 11th, a 12th, a 13th, a 14th and so on. They’re just out there.
4: A surprise witness, Clarissa Ocampo claimed she was one foot away when a relative of one of the Alabang Boys deposited the bribe money to the bank account of DOJ prosecutor John Resado.
3: The Alabang Boys attempted to bribe DOJ Secretary Raul Gonzales with a year-long supply of Viagra. He felt insulted and didn’t sign the release order.
2: When one of the Alabang Boys was chased during the buy-bust operation, he tried to seek refuge at the St. Luke’s Medical Center (clasping his chest), but PDEA agents caught him before he could reach the hospital.
And the No. 1 shocking finding of the independent probe conducted on the Alabang Boys bribery scandal…
1: This is a high-profile scandal, right? But guess what? The Alabang Boys were not Ateneans!
In Other News...
Japanese finance minister Shoichi Nakagawa is stepping down following reports that he was drunk at a recent G-7 news conference in Rome. In announcing his plan to quit, Nakagawa said, “I have caused trouble to the people.” If Filipino politicians were to emulate Nakagawa, Filipinos would have be the happiest people ... we’d be a leaderless nation right now.