Question to the Ladies

qatarisun
By qatarisun

Question to the Ladies:

If given a choice, which one would you prefer to be:

1.       You are the wife of the man who has the mistress, and loves her; but he will never leave you (as his wife), as he has committed once, and you guys have kids together, and such…

2.       You are the mistress of the married man, who you love like crazy, and who is deeply in love with you (as a mistress), but who will never leave his wife; he probably will never leave you either, and he supports you on the very high level… extremely high level... but you know for sure: there is no future for you with this man, you will never be his wife.

I know the best answer is NEITHER..

but the question is IF HAVE TO CHOOSE OUT OF THESE TWO...

By eva37de• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
eva37de

well i know.... i understand what you are saying ................

 

but in the example you have given in your question with the possible choises 1 or 2 , it implements that the peple involved knows from each other.....

 

at least the mistress knows, that he is married.... and i suppose the wife knows or suspects something.....

 

There are women who are quite ok with this situation of the betrayed wife.... unbelievable but true..... for what ever reasons... like social standing, financial standing or because they are afraid to be on their own. That a choise you make. i know a couple living together since 20 years, but everyone is doing his own thing.. if it works for them, so be it...

We don t get 100% of all our dreams answered in a mariage. You have to find out, for how much less you are willing to settle.

I personally would not accept things... but for me its simple...... if my husband is not happy enough with me and needs somebody else.... then he will be free to go, because i am not going to wash socks, prepare meals and be there for somebody who doesnt care enough for me...... i am not saying that it iseasy, but i prefere to hurt myself, than to let somebody else do it....

 

it is a difficult subject.............................

 

 

By ICU• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
ICU

Where is your dignity as a woman if you choose either 1 or 2.

Women should never accept less than you are worth for.  

By Oryx• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 3/5
Oryx

Mila a woman after my own heart!

I would be a mad cat woman before entered into either of those options.

 

By baddywon• 14 years 2 months ago.
baddywon

why can not people love independently ? once you find you can not leave any body,then you will be a burden to the man/woman,as wherever he go,what ever he do,he must consider your feeling then ....but if people can love independently,I mean have your own friends,have you own income,and do the most romantic things with your lover..actually it is not so seriously if somebody leave you,,.,I believe we will not die for such reason ,,,

By chingkay• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
chingkay

 

 i think i prepare in number one situation for kids sake then ill try my best to find out the cause ill try to make it up if still no good outcome.....the hell with him.....i kick him outside the house and explain the kids everything.....

 

 

 

 

 

honesty is the best policy

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

sometimes they don't ask you if you would or you wouldn't... and sometimes they just don't inform you that they have someone (or used to have)....

sorry, eh?

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By eva37de• 14 years 2 months ago.
eva37de

So are we talking about only one way??? What would the husband say, if the wife had somebody to keep her company, while he is with his mistress????

is that ok for him???

If not..... dump the guy........

 

would you like to lie to your kids??? just to pretend that everything is ok???

 

 

I am married for a very long time but would never ever share my husband with somebody else... no way.................... why waste your life on somebody who doesn t appriciate you enough.......

 

have a nice weekend

By spicemom• 14 years 2 months ago.
spicemom

YES MAAM i am gonna go out for a smoke if ya dont see me later then GN i may just curl up with my book otherwise see ya tomorrow - heck is already tomorrow yikes i am gonna sure turn to a pumpkin soon,,,,,,,,,,au revoir and GN QS

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

i am out for a while.. need to grab some fresh air...thanks for being there for me..

spice...

see you a bit later, eh?

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

..have you ever been  married?..well.. you still have a good chance...for both..LOL...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By spicemom• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 2/5
spicemom

hehhehehhehehe yep eyep agreed QS.........hmmm then again we on the other hand can also 'keep them on their toes'. like we are never short of admirers or like one of my GF says - anything he can do she can do better..........lol (each to their own i say, watever makes ya happy but watever it is remember that LOVE YRSELF BEFORE YA CAN LOVE OTHERS)

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
qatarisun

a) all of them get bored with the family life sooner or later

b) all of them want to prove that they are still "marketable"

and so on... which makes all of them are ready for affair... and I don't think that such thing like "post-guiltiness" or "obligation" or "commitment" can stop them... the only thing stops them is... the absence of suitable object around...or let's say the absence of agreed object...lol...

****** [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By QT• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 4/5
QT

I people SOME men only cheat whenever they can, others will probably have cheated in the past, but then realise it was over-rated and they love their partner and then never cheat again! 

So, in a way, I agree with you!

(I'm not talking about me, I've never, ever, ever cheated   )

 

btw, did you read my reply to your last thread "making friends"  LOL

By spicemom• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 2/5
spicemom

they probably cheat out of:

a)boredom

b) out to prove that they are still 'marketable'

c)or just simply peer pressure

d)is basically just a male thingy

 well i may be wrong but this is just my 2 cents worth.......lol

 

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

30% is too low.... ok, let's agree about 50%.. I am not saying that they cheat permanently.. but  at least once in a life time...i think, every normal man has cheated ...lol...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By QT• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 4/5
QT

LOL.   Hard choices eh? 

 

btw, I don't think 80% of men cheat on their wifes!

I think it's more 80% would cheat if they knew how!

That reduces the number down to about 30% of married men cheating!

 

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

don't listen to me... it's not even about me at all.. i just feel a bit lost these days.. like DarUsh said.. something wrong with me...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

 wait.. that's what i have to choose now...lol.. either to become a kind of wife, among 80% of wifes, whose husbands are cheating as soon as they have got a chance ... or to accept the role of permanent "Second Lady"...lol....

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By spicemom• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
spicemom

life is abt choices,believe in yrself and you only live but once.....

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By dragonfly212• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
dragonfly212

good luck with ever decision you make QS. Am positive you can take the best of it. stay strong and fierce.

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By QT• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 4/5
QT

Easy... Dump the married fella!  

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

i probably would choose the first one...specially if I still love my husband.. I would probably take it as it is for our family sake, for our kids sake... blah blah blah...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
qatarisun

that's what exactly I try to figure out: what's wrong with me?... and IF there is something wrong, how can i change it, and what should I do about it...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By QT• 14 years 2 months ago.
QT

Yes Qatarisun, answer Nadt's question!

What would you choose?   LOL

By Vitaline• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 3/5
Vitaline

Nobody will choose anything  from this....

 

But..... better to have love at least for a short time, than not to have at all...( I mean the second)  it's worth everything.. even sharing, unslept nights, waiting, expecting, tears, crazy moments together...

But life put me or myself... in situation 2.... so I understand it very good and what to do... I don't know..

to leave???- I cannot...

to stay for always?- Impossible

And I'm now staying.. for how long... life will show...

 

Maybe, it will be possible???? 

 

But the best answer is :

Better not to have 2 in the same time ...

By jauntie• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
jauntie

alexa, FS,  Nadt and Mila

 

Neither situation works for me ..  although I guess the ladies in each case have the best of both worlds, but so also does the man!

1. Wife has a good lifestyle and isn't 'obliged' to perform in the bedroom ;)

2. Mistress has good lifestyle and 'obliges' when he's in town.

 

win win situation all round :D

By nadt• 14 years 2 months ago.
nadt

what would you choose Qatarisun?

By DaRuDe• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
DaRuDe

 

whats wrong with you these days

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 3/5
qatarisun

with 100 cats....lol.... i can imagine old Mila with 100 cats...lol...no, actually I CANNOT imagine..lol...

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By qatarisun• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
qatarisun

I mean if the choice is given by LIFE, by circumstances, by the way it happened...

 

******* [img_assist|nid=94788|title=*******|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] ... "SUN" is not the mother's child, but our Galaxy's STAR!...

By dragonfly212• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
dragonfly212

i will not let myself to be in this kind situation. no matter how i love my man. just NO WAY!!! i rather be old and live with 100 cats then living with man that never be with me.

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By nadt• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 5/5
nadt

neither..sorry cant choose either one....

ill add choice three for myself: kick his cheating a#### out the door, the mistress can have him all to her self.....baggage and all.....

By Formatted Soul• 14 years 2 months ago.
Rating: 3/5
Formatted Soul

I wont choose both..I am not ready to share my hubby or lover

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