Re-open the Arab men and Western women topic

I seriously don't think Qatar is as safe as it is made out to be.
Having lived here for 3 years - everytime I walk out of my house (ie not drive) I really really dress down. However are you sure all these men are Arab??? I have found the vast majority of harrassment comes from Indians. They have an awful term in India called 'eve teasing' which trivialises and virtually justifies overt sexual harrassment.
If I am not locked 24/7 in the house... then I am fair game attitude.

Practice zero tolerance - silence means its ok.... tell them to get lost loudly and firmly.
Many roads are badly lit and these guys know they have virtual immunity.
Its disgusting - and if we could report properly.. get photos in the paper and then deportation then the problem would soon decrease.

yup it was scary. My daughter was only two weeks at the time. I called my watchman and he came upstairs and told me it was ok cos it was from the water company or something, so I let him in.

I told him my husband was about to arrive any minute and he would kill him. That was after he put his hands in my legs. He left without saying a word.

yes please learn the difference between Qataris or other Arabs and Indians or such. I have found most Arab men are not that forward. They have more manners than that. I however have seen more than one instance with Indians or others who have been too forward. Again not to say a Qatari or Arab is not capable of doing this but it is not common.

dear all...having lived here all my life alhamdullilah.. the first lesson my parents told me was
DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR TO ANYONE.NEVER LET ANYONE IN.
i still dont..even if its a known person come to work in the house unless my dad or my husband informs me prior..
i WILL NOT open the door.. they can get lost and come again when the men in the house are available.

sadly i have to agree most of the teasing comes from hormone crazy indians.i went walking around my house area just twice...it also faces the road so its a real busy area...not at all isolated...and the third day of walking i had idiots whistling at me from inside the cooperative society...and i am fully dressed with headscarf.the minute i would get out for my walk one idiot from the villa would get on his cycle and follow me on the main road.....again an indian.

my friend living near muntaza health centre...another busy area had a van come towards her and invite her inside 3 times.she had her kid in the stroller with her. at first she thought he was an arab then up close he was another pervert indian.

anyones fair game to these perverts.
ITS NOT ARABS U NEED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT BUT MOSTLY THE HORMONE CRAZY STARVING ASIANS HERE.

its much much better now.earlier u would not be able to enter the souqs because the pathans were famous for pinching your bottoms.

my elderly neighbour had a arab guy follow her till the house bcos she wud go out at a particular time everyday in the morning and come back walking..and she would dress nice. she didnt enter her house but came into our house out of fear...the man waited a full 15mins before he left....we all waited n watched with out hearts thudding till he left.whom do we call....unless u can speak in arabic and fight like crazy...no point calling anyone.my first insticnt would be to thrash the person up but when the police arrive u shud be able to defend yourself...else the one speaking arabic can just get away.

for stay at home ladies NEVER FOLLOW A PATTERN OF ACTIONS..SOMEONES ALWAYS WATCHING YOU. I FOLLOW THIS STRICTLY.

I wouldn't call Indian men 'hormone crazy' I just call it damm right ignorance and disrespect. The behaviour patterns can be like pack animals - its bestial.

There are good and bad folk everywhere but actually I have found as long as I am pretty firm with boundaries and behave decouriously Arab men are fine and many very courteous. Unfortunately I have only seen minimal charm and grace from Indian males and find them uncompassionate and agressive.

I think a society shows its true colours by how it treats its weakest members. As a female I am preceived (ha ha!) as this...so it is an inditement on the perpertrator's thinking.

Tip: If you live in a dimly lit area Carry a fork in your pocket... it isn't seen as a dangerous weapon but if worse came to worse I am sure if a guy had one stuck in his goolies it would be rather painful. (Then call me so I can come and laugh)

are u from india oryx.
i will tell u what we do back home.in india the transport service is used by all young,old,working etc...like it is everywhere else too...except maybe qatar.eveteasing is ver common in india.
we usually carry open safetypins in our hands.the buses get very very crowded and u will have some happy guy pushing his "u know what" against you....its not unheard of women pushing their safety pins against their "u know what".i used to have a bunch of pins with me.
also its very common to have some commotion in buses back home.women very happily slap the perverts and once it starts then its usually god have mercy on that guy...bcos either all the women get together and beat teh crap out of the fellow or the other male folk of the bus will do so....usually the bus attendants called conductors intervene and throw the pervert out of the bus.
we usually have perverts trying to travel by the bus that takes the school routes just to take a peek at the girls.
safety pin will be more painful than a fork and easier to carry.

just dont walk in any dark alleys or dimlit areas.

its not ignorance or disrespect...its just taking a chance n trying to get away with it bcos they r desperate for anykind of contact with the female kind.

happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home

Just because the broken car is black and someone says so does not mean that all black cars are broken. Too bad for some nationalities that the LARGE majority of hem each of us comes in contact with give the rest a bad name. Lets for example look at (about to not be PC) the blacks in america... as a whole just individuals gtting through life...however due to the decisions a few have made the rest of the world is trying to live "Thug Life". Is this racist...or is it learned from the perception of YOUR actions? The well mannered well behaved individuals of any culture or society should rein in their compatriots before they CRY about racism. Fix your problems since you see them just as clearly as us, yet you hide behind excuses and facades to avoid admitting that there are some seriously screwed about opinions about any culture or group tht have been derived from the very actions of that group. Prejudice is learned from lack of ignorance in such a diverse world.

tg, you blatantly have no grasp at what I was referring to, I said all Arab men, but then after the comments that have been brought up maybe I should have included Asian men!
As quite rightly pointed out they tend to be the worst at sexually harrasing women, western/white women are not there for you amusement or sexual gratification regardless of who you think you are!

Tyler, well said!!!
No idea where the hell G/Bay and the rest of that twoddle came from that tg was spouting, talk about missing the subject completely!!!!

Well guys unfortunatly in a country that is very conservative you dont get much in-betweens, you either get people who are very well mannered and nice, or people who should be locked up in the cell next to Hannibal from silence of the lambs!
Sadly there are crimes that take place some of them so twisted in nature that even extremely twisted porn companies have turned down the idea of imitating what happened in any way! And the newspaper does write about them, the arabic newspaper decided sometime this year to go all out and write them and it was disgusting to realize some of the things i read could actually be done! But people did not get away with it, the least sentences were 25 years to life in prison! Yes castration should have been a plus but they didnt go for that. There are some qatari's who do commit horrible crimes, but they dont represent everyone and they dont get away with it!

I dont know what you mean by sexual harrasement man, maybe a facial gesture or a stare or sayign something then i can see that happening if your wife is hot, i see it happening in any country actually not just qatar. But if they are in anyway touching her or coming near her with the intent to touch her in anyway then yes we need to put a stop to that and the law will stand with u.

However you mention take their license plate number so are these guys just cutting her off on the road? or driving by her and staring? I dont get what you mean by they are sexually harrasing her? However if someone does have the nerve to touch her you give me a call because maiming disrespectful qatari's happens to be a favourite hobby of mine. Sexually harassing someone is difficult when the guy is ina wheelchair with a neckbrace on, trying to flirt with a stephen hawkings voice isnt exactly gonna work either for them!

Butterfly What?!?!

You didn't call the police immediately...think of what this freak can do to someone else?

Who was this guy and how did he know where you lived??

Was it just some random fool that followed you all the way to your appartment?

or was he knocking on doors trying his luck??

Poor Butterfly sorry you had to experience such a terrifying situation :(

My wife was taking english lessons in Berlitz, and there was a chinese girl, who was in her group. One week before the end of the course, this girl disappeared after going to Corniche for a walk. Her aunt came to the courses crying and was asking everybody - may be someone knows something. Her passport, ID all was left at home. She was reported missing to the police and as far as I know never found.

Tough one..... Lets put it like this I am a person, not a color or a race just a person. I point blank refuse to be catergorised regardless of the color of my skin, my birth right or my gender. I do not and refuse to understand the Persicutions suffored by "Afro Amercian's in "Y2k+" based on the fact that MANY lost their lives in the past for these people to have the freedom that they have today, and those that CHOOSE to go through life with the chip on their shoulder deserve everything that they get.....

REF the situation in Qatar with harrasment - As a female, I have suffered this ALOT, it does not matter if I am dressed up or down, on my way back from the gym, looking like %$#/-a-t-/ looking fíng fabulous or with my husband, it does not matter... there they are in all their splender ready to give you/me their best shot. I used to get upset when my Husband would shout or threaten them, I would say, dont be cruel they dont know any better... but I am wrong, they do know better and they choose not too. I mean even when I am with my husband they try it on and am sure they are not too fussed when my husband tells them OFF, they just see that as a sign to come back and try later maybe when he is not there. My attitude has changed, I now recognise that attitude allowed them to think that staring, following, calling, touching etc was ok and it is NOT.

After my last encounter with a TCN let's just say that I do not think that individual will EVER try anything with anyone EVER...... (evil Laugh)

Princess

sure men of all races will look at a pretty woman but the difference is, westerners generally have enough humility to look away and get back to their own business if you stare back or furrow your brow at them.

My experience here has been that the most uncomfortable places are the ones where the manual workers frequent, yes I think they are mostly Indian, Pakistani and Bangladeshi. They stare and stare, as a group, and just keep staring and smirking! I even bought an abayya to wear to the local supermarket because i couldnt put up with it anymore.

In the abayya, the arabs give me looks like "i want to marry you" which is quite amusing (given my brown eyes dont give away my race) and much easier to cope with than the predatory "you're a juicy piece of meat" looks i am subjected to in western clothes.

Angelo, who cares if they are Nepali Bangladeshi or Indians - to a western eye they all look and speak the same. In most of the cases it is even difficult to distinguish one person from another - they all are dark skinned, smelly in strange clothes and speaking gutural language.

I for myself can recognize only northern indians with fair skin and almost european look. But again, they are mostly educated professionals and are not of that ilk.

why do you take offense to the truth...indian,nepali,bangladeshi,pakistani guys do act funny when a woman is around.its bcos they are away from family for years together and here too they are bundled up in camps with no exposure to anything outside work......i dont mind the staring...but the min they try to talk and approach even with the intention of talking...i get all defensive.
u are asking about department stores....go to new world centre,lulu and such places.....if u are by yourself....someone is going to start singing some crazy suggestive song and they will always be staring at you and doing so.......this is very common.they get a thrill out of it.i have gotten used to keep my ears all out open to hear out one wrong word to report them....most of the time its harmless...but given the chance they can get nasty.they wont do so if a male is around you.

butterfly........if u are accompanied by a kid.......the message they get is a total reverse...u are a much easy target......bcos they think u are defenseless with a kid....ur reaction time slows down bcos of the kid and its really scary bcos ur first instict is to get away for the sake of your kid and then yourself.......its so much more easy to come on to you. a few seconds is enough to traumatise anyone.

happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home

Han I don't mean they were convicted.
It's impossible that they would just come to Doha and start a life of crime.
I totally agree with you that parents are responsible for their own children...so why leave your child with a women who is a complete stranger..also in most cases these women are bitter and carry A LOT of baggage. As for the driver I just can't understand why someone would bring one of these men into their own homes...goodness it's bad enough they are on the street.

Really no one place in this world is "safe" we should always take care of ourselves and our children...never be too naive.

i agree with you hamlet...that if these men had their families here with them then it wud probably be a better scenario.........no one is condeming anyone or their origins.the whole discussion is of what is going on here and by whom.

we are not talking about USA either...at present we are all here in doha and this is going on in doha.....so what do we do about it here other than exercise caution and be careful.

esl teacher i agree the maids carry around a lot of baggage..but why do they get bitter...its bcos they are not treated like people...but like slaves here....who wont be bitter. we need food.shelter.clothes to cover and respect.if someone disrespects you or illtreats you...would u be nice.everyone deserves respect simple because we are all humans.all labour class people come here with hopes in mind to take care of someone back home...but they are here its a different story altogether.......no respect,weird working hours,no pay,female abuses in households,...who wont be bitter.we have read in the paper how easily maids are taken to court for stealing a can of nivea...how trivial can people get.

u asked why shud we leave our kids with strangers..some have to do it out of no choice....most dont earn good salaries....both husband n wife have to work...easiest wud be to have someone look after them at home.......its a big risk...but they choose to take it n are responsible for it.........they have weighed the pros and cons of maid vs nursery and they feel having a maid is more economical and advantageous.if u consider 300 for a child in a nursery..if u have 2-3 kids...its still a huge pinch for most parents who are shelling out 3/4th of the salary on house rents.

i am not trying to support or criticise anyone...but this is just another way of looking at it.

we have to be careful....we have to keep a watch on our kids...period.

" asking about department stores....go to new world centre,lulu and such places.....if u are by yourself....someone is going to start singing some crazy suggestive song and they will always be staring at you and doing so......."

I found stores, supermarkets, malls, parks, Corniche etc to be absolutely safe, no problems at all there...Normally I get into unconfortable situations when I walk the streets, around my neighbourhood, or walking to places etc..

hey terramax u have made some very strong remarks...sadly i dont agree with you.
i too am a south indian...and proud to be highly educated...........neither do i speak the kind of language suggested by your post.colour of my skin is debatable by north and south india.

happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home

we have all been telling how it is for each one of us.everyones speaking from their experience...no ones talking off their heads.

but if anyone makes strong remarks...expect a retort ............

oryx...by naming and shaming over here on this forum how is it helping you?

i have stated this earlier...lets not use this forum to let go of our frustrations and annoyance..........you have a matter on hand to discuss...then discuss it as it is.

There is no solution...It's not even that dangerous, apart from that experience, I have not feared for my safety in Doha...it's just so bloody annoying and there isn't much that can be done about it...one of those annoyances of living here, just like crazy drivers or hot summers, you can complain about it but you cannot do anything to change it...

You just have to learn to live with it. And for every rude idiot you come across in the streets there are lots of wonderful and well educated people around.

But I won't give up my daily strolls or change the way I dress & behave. I, just like every other woman here, just have to keep learning how to deal with it.

Ok, labourers behave like gentelemen, they take a shower and shave every day, and all of them fair skinned, and if I see a thousand, I will remember them all and can just by looking at them which valley and creek of subcontinent they come from. Happy now? The pride of India restored?

Whenever anyone disagrees with Terramax, he tends to get on the defensive !!! And keeps repeating "get a life" !!! Mind you, here the posts only disagreed with him, but he turned it around as some sort of counter-attack. Actually I was going to respond to his "strong" post, but I knew what the response would be, so I kept quiet.
Anyway, he is entitled to his own view as everyone else is, so no need to get defensive, no need to counterattack those who disagree with you !!!

Reminds me of one gentleman who said sometime back "You are either with us or against us !!!"

Hello,
Plz, can only 1 tell me more about the life in qatar. i am a graduate of chemical/Polymer Engineering, i wanted or plaaning to come to qatar. In there a prospect there and how can i secure job in qatar.
A lot of thanks
Kuti Y O

Qatexpat: It not about disagreeing with me. Everybody is entitled to his own opinion. I "get on defencive" only when I am accused of racism.

In any other country I would have simply taken the accuser to the court. In Brazil to be a racist or to accuse anyone of being a racist is a serious crime which can take you to a jail.Here my only recourse is to reply.

But you are right, I should get a life. Let them find out themselves who is horny and who is smelly. Just keep us posted.

its not fare to blame a community of nationality for bad things done by a very few . in all the communities, there are good and bad people. i could find few posting s here which blames others to justify one community.

I also believe that the reason for all these bad things are
1. Lack of proper education
2. The situation, the family, the society where he brought up

Generally, men like pretty women. But it doesnt or it should not be harrasing or teasing them. But should not harrase or torture them. Just think about our mother and sisters at home, then we will never think of doing any thing bad to a women.

There are few bad people in all kinds of community. But i believe that if the government decides, they can stop or atleast they can reduce those types of incedents by imposing strict rule.

but most of the time, the police is biased towards some community. first they should be fare and good in dealing. they should know their duty. they should do the justice.

honey.....we have been dealing with it all along...until this subject came up on this forum.now we are all discussing it....dont know where it is going though.

Han19: I don't understand WHY are you so upset with the word guttural. Please look it up in the dictionary, before stirring a tempest in a glass of water.

gut‧tur‧al [guht-er-uhl] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective 1. of or pertaining to the throat.
2. harsh; throaty.
3. Phonetics. pertaining to or characterized by a sound articulated in the back of the mouth, as the non-English velar fricative sound [kh] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation.

–noun 4. a guttural sound.

What for generalisation like "The rest of India is filled with illiterates" - you said it, not me. I don't know what India is filled with, I am talking about labourers vs educated indian professionals in Qatar. For some reason highly paid educated indians are clear skin indoeuropeans, and low wages labourers in camps are dravids from south. Of course there are exceptions, but this is a fact which has nothing to do with me.

We have same problem in Brazil, where poor uneducated people mostly come from african origin, and educated professionals of european. There are many exceptions, and situation is changing, as the whole society recognizes it and tries to revert it.

Stop looking for an insult in everything what is said, it shows your insecurty about your origins.

This forum is a Melting pot of opinions and statements, got real crazy and very interesting.

But nothing much has being spoken about the local Laws.

Every one came up with mechanism of defense, experiences and some legal roads to follow.

Where is the credential of the law?

What are the specifics laws on this matter about sexual assault, harassment and molestation in Qatar?

What agencies to reach over in case of a situation merge?

What kind of criminal system is on place already to protect the rights of the victim and the accused one?

What to do properly in case of a sexual harassment, assault, or molestation?

Calling the police is not enough in my opinion.

In my opinion we need to pamper ourselves with the truth of the law in Qatar.

Let’s lift this course and taboo with legal knowledge.

Knowledge is power.

peace terramax...nobody is looking for an insult......i asked for clarification...bcos somewhere i felt i maybe got the word's meaning wrong............dont get my reason for explanation as something other than a request for explanation.

i agree with dvrgas.

bbk will come tomorrow with an idea of a hi-tech bus which all of us ladies can use...it will be fully equipped with high security, body gaurds,cameras,creep sensors,pervert sensors,other sensors which he can think of.......... the works, to keep the ladies safe.
going by how bbk thinks...u can just replace the body gaurds with robots...for extra security.

I do agree with some of the observations about the tendenceis of men from certain countries having staring probs, engaging in sexual harassment,etc. Certain types of women, unfortunately, are considered 'fair game' for them. It not only happens to Western women in South Asia, but South Asian women wearing westernized clothing. And it happens to fairly ugly white girls as well. So it's not necessarily something about beauty, but about how the culprit perceives the sexuality of the victim.

But we'd have to be a bit more accurate and understand that we are not getting a random sample of people from a certain country. From South Asia, we are getting large numbers of the lower class and lower-middle class. Single, poor men, without access to women. Moreover, there are attractive women around them, but they have no ability to engage them because of a variety of reasons, including class, income, racial, and language barriers.

Let's say you were in NY, and you took out the white people, except for the construction workers. Now, NY construction workers are 100X worse than the laborers here. Should we use experiences with them to make conclusion about white males?

Should we start a thread about white men and non-Western women? About how nerdy white guys get rent a brides from the developing world or go elsewhere for "sex tourism" and molest little children? Are other factors involved, like wealth? I think it's fair to make cultural assumptions/conclusions -- but let's not reduce our analysis to a single factor.

This forum is a Melting pot of opinions and statements, got real crazy and very interesting.

But nothing much has being spoken about the local Laws.

Every one came up with mechanism of defense, experiences and some legal roads to follow.

Where is the credential of the law?

What are the specifics laws on this matter about sexual assault, harassment and molestation in Qatar?

What agencies to reach over in case of a situation merge?

What kind of criminal system is on place already to protect the rights of the victim and the accused one?

What to do properly in case of a sexual harassment, assault, or molestation?

Calling the police is not enough in my opinion.

In my opinion we need to pamper ourselves with the truth of the law in Qatar.

Let’s lift this course and taboo with legal knowledge.

Knowledge is power.

I agree with Truth...so many people over here have this mentality that women from the West are actually what they watch on television. That is why "Western Women" wearing "Western clothing" get hounded..it's because these men somehow believe they actually have a chance of dating them. Even Arab men have this vision of Western Women and when they come to Canada...they really embarass us all...

They think these women would actually desire this kind of attention, unfortunately they haven't realized that these women didn't just walk out of a Hollywood drama. Sure they may not be covered head-to-toe but they are still dignified women who deserve respect.

Most qataries that I have come across are gentlemen, respectful and have impecable manners...(well, except when they drive!) I don't want anyone who reads this thread to be under the impression that qataries are disrespectful to women. It's many male expatriates, arab, indian, or any other nationality, that give shame to this country.

As for your number :P post it! It's always helpful to call a martial arts expert ready to go and get the ladies out of trouble, 24/7!!!

Talking abt the driving ... this afternoon i took my son to Mc.D in C ring road before starting his tae kwon do class. Then when we head back to the C ring road ... it was so buuuussssyyyy